Ask Brazil

I was wondering if you could give me information concerning some of the second generation Japanese that have returned recently?

What did you do to them?

Então, Japa,

You asked for Japanese, and I sent them? The thing is, most of the families here didn't have the costume of keeping the language going, y'know? Or if they did, the Japanese passed on got old, which is also what happened to the Germans too. When they came here, they... I remember they had the dream of returning, but money was short so it's all very far-fetched... It's not nice receiving people when all they talk about is leaving.

And so they had children here in Brazil, who are Brazilians of course, you'd expect them to be what, Argentines?! And I do admit they... haha, got a bit more.. Brazilian. It happens? I don't know, man, you wanted them, and sounded like a good idea back then because I was going through quite the inflation period! Besides, the Japanese who came here the first time didn't speak Portuguese either, there you go. They adapted, but they still look very Japanese to me, despite what your people may say.

I'm sorry if I'm being rude, you don't need to hear my BS, but c'mon! I mean, I hope I answered what you asked there, bro.

---

Turquia!

Oh, you... But I know that sweet-talk, I'm guilty of using it myself, so complimenting my skills won't get you anywhere. Or maybe they will? I mean, so I've heard you're not that bad either, although you're older than my dad or something... (I think you Europeans just have this competition on who's older than who) Not that it'd make me reject the idea, hypothetically. You're still old.

And right, that's all beside the point. Wait, woah there, you mean he couldn't even come here ask it himself? And the guy brags about competence... Honestly! I mean, I can't do anything about the fact he can't look down at his own pants without blushing, you'd expect the guy who declared two wars to... See, know things better, no? I have no idea. But I can show him moves, if he's alright with it— Wait, you're asking me to teach him how to woo someone or dance? Because they are different things...

I mean, Samba is about feeling good, and so is forró! Is about dancing together and being close~! Alright, so there's a roll of hips here and there, don't you guys dance in Europe?! And have you seen tango? Someone go teach Martín the difference between sex and dance... I'm sorry, what was the question again?

...

Oh, right! No, I don't need his money, caramba, what is up with him?! I'll go talk to Germany instead, you wait there, Sadik!

What?! Oh, that blind one? Ahhh, I remember!! Hahahaha, well, those lands belonged to my mother, perhaps she thought it would be funny? Sweetheart, I have no control over what grows where, especially when it comes to the Amazon, but I must say Alfred found it hilarious.

Now, if this is an excuse you pulled because you want to see the snake for yourself, María, you can pass by my place after work and I can show you all my wild fauna, if you know what I am talking about. *winks back*

Amor da minha vida, who am I to deny such willing help from a lady as yourself? I guarantee there's no trouble from my part, whatsoever, but as they say, any help is very welcome. *salutes* See you later, tchutchuca.

Ah, there goes my chance with her... Damnit! Lo siento? Ainda assim, cursing like that you're only proving my point, María.

FUCKS SAKE, SOMEBODY, HELP ME HERE, THIS WOMAN IS MAD!

No, no, now you watch your mouth there! It was a joke, a JOKE that you clearly can't even get your head to understand because it's so filled up with make up I... I treat you like a lady! I do! Which is a huge step forward because you're never thankful, and I got you into Mercosul and everything! So much for nothing.

The hell does the borders have to doooo with anything?! I am going to ignore you, woman, you're mad. The borders are there, and you can use my advice from time to time — I'll casually remind you of that 'Take you hands off Venezuela' protest in my defense, which you loved. Alright, kill me, but next time Turkey comes demanding you money, or Alfred is being a pest, I won't help. See if I will!

...Louca, é isso que 'cê é. E chata pra burro.

Just passing by to laugh and eat my popcorn.

Che, now seriously, I have a question, where do you like to spend the Carnaval the most, from what I know it's really different from place to place and where would you suggest for a classy man like me to go during the festivites?